Portal 2 toys are delightful, scientifically unsound and morally ambiguous

We keep every potato that comes our way around here, because on the one hand you shouldn’t throw away food; but on the other hand, they’re potatoes, what the hell do you want us to do with them? Finally ThinkGeek’s come up with a decent answer: we can plug them into this PotatOS Science Kit (opens in new tab) and be authentically berated by a semi-sentient AI semi-powered by the surplus tubers. Thank heaven someone sorted that one out.

Above: Bonus points for not selling a single item (that we could find) pertaining to that damn fake cake

But that’s not the only physical manifestation of in-game in-jokes on offer, oh no. This pint-sized Wheatley (opens in new tab), promises the site, will not only look after your keys but may attempt to kill you in highly inventive ways. If you’re anything like us, you have lifelong friends who’ll only live up to half of that potential… and they don’t even try to be inventive about it either. It’s not the most detailed real-life Wheatley you’ve ever seen, but then again, neither is it the one most likely to consume three months of your life (opens in new tab), so let’s call it even.

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